


Conflicted

by MagicVickri



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, Other, This would be rated G but I swear a whole lot so, gender neutral reader, lots of repeating words because it’s based on my thought process, vent fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-13
Updated: 2017-10-13
Packaged: 2019-01-16 19:38:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12349332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MagicVickri/pseuds/MagicVickri
Summary: Why are you here?





	Conflicted

**Author's Note:**

> I told myself that if I ever wrote a RoadRat/Reader fic it would be a jokefic, but then I had a bad mental health day. So I wrote this to comfort myself, and I hope it uplifts some folks too.

The couch was never that comfortable, so you didn't know why you kept sleeping on it. The cushions felt like there were bricks underneath, but you were always too tired to lift the cushions and check. You lifted yourself up from the couch, back aching as you rubbed your eyes. You raise your arms in the air to stretch, feeling something in your back pop. Much better.

You swing your feet onto the floor and move your body upwards, your blanket falling off your torso and onto the floor. You pick it up, toss it onto the couch and make your way around. There’s tools scattered all over the floor, so you have to watch where you walk to avoid stepping on a hammer or drill bit. Junkrat wasn't known to be a clean fella, now was he?

You have the workshop to yourself every night when he isn't staying up to finish building something. Junkrat said he used to just crash on the couch every night, but after the worldwide heist with Roadhog (where they met you), he no longer wanted to. He had an empty space for you to take up now that he and the big guy were...intimate.

Like yesterday, you could recall everything about their budding relationship unfold before your very eyes. Since the day they found you, you could already see something growing between them. The way they communicated, the way they fought together, the one-sided banter from Junkrat that was quietly reciprocated by Roadhog...it was all there. It was nice, sure, but at the same time it made you feel apart from them. They were already a Thing when you joined them on their adventures. You were just a new face. You still are. You never lived like this, never lived the way they did. You weren't familiar with the life of a Junker, and you kept asking yourself time and time again why they decided to befriend you. You were different. You weren't a world renown criminal before they came into your life.

But you wanted this. You hated the life you had back home. There was no excitement, no fulfillment anywhere for you. And that one fateful day when they crashed into the window of your apartment building, into your bedroom, and saw the life you lived, it changed everything. The chance of a lifetime; to escape from that hellhole and fight against capitalism was a dream come true. But now, as you're here in Roadhog and Junkrat’s hometown Junkertown, you couldn't help but feel more disconnected.

The room was starting to close in on you. You couldn't stand looking at the walls. You step outside into the cool, early morning air. The moon was still out, its glow illuminating you and the space around you with a light blue hue. It was beautiful, but unfortunately did nothing for your nerves. Your mind was still reeling. Should you just leave? Walk away and find a way back home? Where would you go? You had no vehicle. You didn't know anybody. If the Junkertown citizens knew who you were affiliated with, they might shoot you on the spot. Did you even want to leave? No. Not really. You're just overthinking everything as usual. Stop that. Stop and think of all the good things instead.

So you do. You think about all the times Junkrat laughed at your jokes, no matter how corny they were. You picture the way his face contorts into one of a pure, unique joy, his typically unconventional features scrunching into something cute when he smiles. Knowing that you could make that come out of him brought a swelling feeling of pride in your chest. Your mind wandered to Roadhog, and to how great of a listener he was. He barely ever spoke, but something about his silence when you opened up to him during your bad nights felt like he was giving you his full attention. The way he would pull you in with one of his massive, warm and buff arms was a luxury you didn't think you could afford. As you spoke he would reassure you with small nods and sounds, and you had never felt more cared for in your entire life.

You were one of them. You played a part in their heists, and you always had fun. The high speed chases with police officers made your adrenaline run high to levels you never thought you could reach. Playing as a lookout was thrilling, wearing disguises was tons of fun. The three of you had fun together.

They want you around. They like having you around. They like you. They love you.

And you love them.

You were looking up at the sky this whole time. Just standing outside alone and staring at the moon. You brought your head down, and turned towards the side door of Roadhog’s house. You wondered what they were doing right now. Probably still asleep, considering how early it was. You were surprised that you couldn't hear their snores from outside; during your travels you had a hard time sleeping some nights because Roadhog and Junkrat snored so loud. It's a wonder how they were able to even sleep next to each other. You step closer to the side door that was slightly ajar, and sure enough you could hear the two sleeping loudly inside.

Sliding the door the rest of the way open, you step inside. Down the small hallway, you enter the large room that also worked as a garage. You’re greeted by the infamous motorcycle, Hog’s hog if you will. The large bike with a small pig head nestled in between the handlebars was still accompanied by Junkrat’s sidecar that stuck out like a sore thumb with its atrocious bright yellow color. While Junkrat had his “treasure” (that he still wouldn't tell you about), this bike was pretty much Roadhog’s treasure. While you couldn't read the large man’s face because of the mask, you felt an aura of admiration for it radiate from his frame on those days when you sat on the workbench and watched him work on it for hours.

Turning away from the bike, you catch a glimpse of the large bed nestled in the corner. There they were, your two companions sleeping the night away. Roadhog laid on his back, one thick arm hanging off the side of the bed while the other embraced the small man on top of him. Junkrat was sprawled out on Roadhog’s stomach, his left cheek smushed against Roadhog’s hairy chest. While you couldn't get a clear view from the distance you were standing, you could swear Junkrat was drooling all over the place. It wasn't unusual for him to do so.

They both looked so comfortable together. Being in each other’s arms and sleeping soundly, quietly enjoying the other’s company. The intimacy made something in your stomach turn; a twinge of loneliness. Even though they consider you a friend and included you in their shenanigans and crimes, you were still a third wheel at the end of the day. You wanted nothing more than to plop yourself between them, wondering what kind of warmth would radiate onto you as Mako and Jamison both held you. That’d be really nice, now would it?

But you knew you could never have that. You were suddenly disgusted with yourself. Trying to butt into what they have. You hated the fact that they made you feel even more alone than you already were before they found you. You wanted to resent them for it. The large garage’s walls were suddenly appearing to come closer, suffocating you. Everything was making you sick. You needed to get the hell out of there. You turned around, peering at the door. You needed to move your feet across the floor and leave. Get out of their house and their lives forever and go back to yours. This was all a big mistake. This was al-

“Oi, ya needed somethin’?” a voice said.

You froze. That was Junkrat. How did he wake up? Were you thinking too loudly? You didn't know he was actually a light sleeper. He had looked so knocked out, you couldn't have been able to tell. But he was talking to you now, and it would be a dick move to not saying anything especially since you just strolled into the house unannounced. You turn your body back towards the bed, and notice that not only was the blond awake but Roadhog was as well. Junkrat lifted himself up from his partner who stayed vertical due to his mask being attached to the tank hanging on the side of the bed frame, and sat himself onto the edge of the mattress. He always took his prosthetics off before going to bed, surely for his own comfort and not to let the metal rub and poke against Roadhog. Surely that couldn’t be comfortable. But seeing him without his prosthetics and seeing Roadhog without his armor was never not weird. Almost felt like you walked in on them naked.

Both of them staring at you now, waiting for an answer, you feel yourself choke as you search for something to say. Something to not raise any more suspicion. Excuses start running through your head, each of them getting stupider by the second as you begin to sweat. “U-uh, I uh,” you muster. “I uh, wanted a midnight snack. But I...realized you two were still asleep and didn't wanna wake you guys up so i’ll-”

“Don’t gotta lie ta me mate,” Junkrat said. “Other house ain’t got no doors! If you were cold ya coulda just said so!”

Well. You guess he wasn’t entirely wrong. Shit was fucking cold out there. How in the hell did he even endure that before he started sharing a bed with Roadhog anyways?

“If ya wanted ta spend tha night in ‘ere ya can!” Junkrat exclaimed as he pat a small space on the bed. “There’s room fer one more, right Hog?”

“Think so,” Roadhog replied.

Oh god. They’re inviting you over. They’re letting you share the bed with them. You’re panicking now. What are you going to do. What should you do? Take the offer? No, you’re just butting into what they have that you can’t have because it’s theirs and not yours and you don’t belong here and they already have each other and who the hell do you think you are and you never should have come here. But say no? Go back to that miserable cold shack and that lumpy ass couch and resume hating yourself and feeling tormented by your never ending feelings of dread and loneliness? Better to be miserable by yourself than inflict it on other people and ruin THEIR happiness.

But were you ruining Roadhog and Junkrat’s happiness?

They said it was okay. They think it’s okay. They think you’re okay. It’s okay. You’re okay. Everything will be okay.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

“Sounds pretty good to me,” you finally spit out. “Scoot over, then.”

You walk over to the bed, and Junkrat lies back down opposite of Roadhog. There’s space between the two men for you to plop yourself into, and the second you lie down you suddenly feel like you don’t give a shit about anything anymore. Before you know it, Roadhog’s slowly pulling you close to him with his left arm. You find yourself squished comfortably against his large belly, and it’s the safest you’ve ever felt in your whole existence. Junkrat’s got his remaining arm swung around you too, resting his cheek on top of your head. Before you could even tell the blond goodnight, he’s already begun snoring. Well, okay.

You instead look up at Roadhog, who already appeared to be staring at you. The eye contact makes you flush in nervousness, but you’re snapped out of your nerves when you hear a small huff from under his mask.

“You deserve us,” he says to you.

You’re still staring at him, still watching him even as he lowers his head onto the pillows beneath the three of you, still looking at the masked man as he slips into slumber. You don’t know if he meant that in a good way, or bad, or maybe even neither. And yet, it fills you with a sense of validation, and an answer to a question you’ve been asking yourself for God knows how long.

You are loved.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!! If ya like my stuff feel free to hit my ass up on tumblr and/or twitter @masterbunne.
> 
> Bye for now! ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿


End file.
